If only I have a pillow by the river. Love reading in a relaxing environment, though it's often hard to do it. Most of my readings are done at airports...

A Monster Calls - Patrick Ness, Jim Kay

The book is so captive from the beginning. It's not long, only 200 pages, with illustrations here and there. I cannot put down the book until I finished it. It's quite mystery from the very beginning, also to the end. The ending is unexpected although you know that the monster definitely would have something to do with the protagonist's life and mind. The truth is heart wrenching, extremely powerful at the climax of its mystery. 



Now is the spoiler part. When Ben, the protagonist talks to his mom for the last time. His mom's assurance that it's alright if many years later he ever felt sorry that he didn't talk to his mom for the last few minutes, but instead just being angry that his mom "lied" to him about how serious her conditions were, it's alright. Because she knew, she knew all what he wanted to say. It made me tearing up. Here are two screenshots of these two pages (I don't even know it's legal or not to post them here, but I like it too much to care). 


The explanation for all the nonsense stories told by the monster is flawless. I have to quote the conversation between the monster and Ben in the last few pages. 


Monster: The answer is that it does not matter what you think, because your mind will contradict itself a hundred times each day. You wanted her to go at the same time you were desperate for me to save her. Your mind will believe comforting lies while also knowing the painful truths that make those lies necessary. And your mind will punish you for believing both.


Ben: But how do you fight it? How do you fight all the different stuff inside?


Monster: By speaking the truth. As you spoke it just now.



Hope all people suffering from this contradiction can accept this fact now and just be honest with themselves. Your mind can have ideas from both ends of the spectrum, and it's OK. Even if the society may suggest consistency as a good virtue. 

(show spoiler)